Raisin Heater

The warden tore up Full Tilt 3/6 short limit last night playin 2 tables. +375 cha cha ching.

I didnt get details since I was so jealous (have not played in almost a week). I did play 6 sit n snores at UB last weekend and cashed in 3 and won 1, so I can still play a little. I hear reelcrazy's wife is the best player in his house now but that won't happen to your hero (uhh...me).

Saw a cool sign on the way to work yesterday. ADULT UNDERWEAR (pullups and briefs) Full case delivery available

No shit!

When i'm 6 tablin' and on a heater do I take a bathroom break........depends!

Tourney players special! Maybe its just me, but I don't mind buying those at the regular store. And I can get'em by the case at Albertsons.

How do you know when you have a drinking problem? When you start calling your drinkin' buddies "teammates".

Good posts in the forum lately. I love the tourney reports as players are chasing down a nice cash. GIMME SUM SWEAT BRUDDA!

I'm going to list my Top 100 Movies of All Time in the next 4 posts
Thats 25 at a time for you math majors. No particular order.
I'll pick my top ten when i'm done.

Pulp Fiction
Road Warrior
GoodFellas
True Romance
Boiler Room
Rounders
Reservoir Dogs
Godfather 1
Godfather 2
Sling Blade
Blade Runner
The Hustler
Body Heat
Fargo
Leaving Las Vegas
One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest
Scarface
Cool Hand Luke
Seven Samurai
Shawshank Redemption
Unforgiven
Mystic River
Deer Hunter
Heat
Lock Stock and Two Smoking Barrels

Welcome to 200 NEW Shark players/members this last week! New players! Please....bet, rayz or fold! No calling stations in this Army!

Anyone else work for an INEPT boss?

I do.

Woke up.

Worked on the new site ( sharks vegas strip ) till 1. Took the warden sum flowers (5th anniv today) kissed her, went to work.

Got to work late, got a call from a customer that I have been trying to sell a new Subaru to for 5 weeks. Great guy, he said 5 weeks ago he would buy from me once his money from St Croix was here. He has lived there the last 4 years, Anyhoo, I have spent maybe 8 hours with him in 2 visits and several phone calls the last month.

He calls and says, "hey didnt your general mgr tell you I stopped in (again) last week?" Uh...no he didnt. If I was inept enough to help our Gen Mgrs. customer and then not tell him or leave a note for him I would be pounded into submission by my horrible lack of professionalism. And he would be correct.

"ya, hes great....he told me I could have it for just over cost when I was ready".

My customer was thrilled cause I had told him the sticker price was fair and reasonable (it is on Subarus).

So my 8 hrs of work and $400 commission was turned into a $100 commission. The customer is a great guy and was more then happy to let me make a fair profit. Our Gen Mgr is to inept to understand that its not about money or the "deal". Its about treating customers great for 5 weeks so they are happy to pay a fair price and let you make some profit to feed your family.

He doesnt care. His check is huge whether I sell it for sticker price or not. Lots of incompetents out there. Sometimes you work for them. I hate working with untrained, mediocre car people. But the Gen. Sales Mgr.?

Do you work for someone that isn't qualified to sell hot dogs in front of home depot?
Welcome to Sharkeees world. Nine more months.

Went home, took warden to nice dinner, had 3 full sail pale ales and now goin to bed.

Shitty day at work, great wife.....things could be worse.

1. without skill or aptitude for a particular task or assignment; maladroit: He is inept at mechanical tasks. She is inept at dealing with people.
2. generally awkward or clumsy; haplessly incompetent.
3. inappropriate; unsuitable; out of place.
4. absurd or foolish: an inept remark.

"All of the ABOVE"

Tuff_Fish

Check out this Online NL animal, tuff_fish

Mr Fish

Bad Day?

God Bless America

Heres a bunch more if you need a few more laughs

Lotsa Tuff Fish

Question in the forum:

Just wondering what peoples opinions are. I have never played live yet but am getting ready to. Where are the better players. Live or online? What should I expect. I have no problems with $2\$4 limit full table online and have even tried $5\$$10 successfully albeit for only about 20 minutes.
So with that in mind, what limit should I try live. What type of players should I expect? Will they be better, worse or the same? I ask because I was watching "Live from the Bike" this morning and they were playin $5\$10 and I could not believe the cards these people were playin. Even the commentators called them fish. So with that in mind I look to you guys to point me in the right direction and as always many thanks for your help

my reply:

We have weird casinos here. Most like to spread 3/6 or 4/8 or 4/8 with a kill. The players are almost always horrible. Probably the same as 1/2 online (or worse). I quit going because its a long drive to a casino that spreads bigger games.

Always play at least 4/8. The rake kills ya in smaller games. Str8s and flushies are king cause thats what it takes most of the time to beat all the chasers. sooted connectors and sooted Ax are powerhouses when you hit the flop. Top pr, good kicker sucks in 4-6 way action. And you will see alotta 6 way action.

Just put as many bets in as you can when you have the best of it. They'll follow.

Moving to 6/12 or 8/16 the play improves, but there are still plenty of donks per capita. I enjoy these games much more because you can bluff or re-raise pre and get sum respect. The 8/16 at the Bellagio usually has 3-4 good players and 5-6 bad ones. The bad ones are similar to what you would see at Sun about din din time at 2/4.

Mirage is about the same. Every table is different but those are sum general observations. In Vegas you might find 5 good players at 4/8 (local grinders, usually retirees) but you'll know quick enough if its a bad table. Then move to another table or move up.

You will get much better reads live. Thats the best part. You can intimidate much easier. Many live guys just want callers, I reraise and check raise alot. Watch their sphincters tighten up. Fun.

If you try a bigger game, expect to be nervous. It will take a few hours to feel comfy with bigger bet sizes. Example: My wifeys first 6/12 game. Mirage last May. She was playin great at 4/8 so I talked her into 6/12.

Early on she raised my flop bet to $12 and I reraised to $18. Turn I hit my draw, checked, she bet and I raised to $24 and she raised to $36 and when I went to $48 she got ne ne ne nervous. Thats alotta money for a 4/8 playa. At 4/8 it would be no biggie since she has dun it many times.

It just takes throwin a buncha chips in several time to get use to it. Take some shots at bigger games, get comfy with bigger bets. You'll play tighter at first, thats okay.

Good post from Gumby:
(check out his bloggage at bottom. It's stronger then battery acid)

I would have to say that there are going to be fish anywhere you play. You can see fish playing the $1000/2000 game at the Bellagio. Just because people have money doesn't make them any better at poker.

What I have found, is that there are some tables that play extremely loose and others that play extremely tight at the same poker room. I play 2/4 and have only had 1 losing session playing live. I think playing a tight aggressive style at an loose aggressive table is right. As far as a loose passive table, the best table, I tend to see more flops cheap and make them pay to see the river if I hit my hand or draw. Otherwise, I get out with only $2 lost.

I don't know what casino you are going to play at, but I know that many games are very fishy, no matter what limit you are playing. Within one rotation, you'll find out who the good players are.

Hope this helps!

Good Luck!
_________________
GUMBY
Read my blog!
Gummster bloggage

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Shark Staked playa, Connjure report from WCOOP

PokerStars World Championship of Online Poker is coming soooon
$10,000,000 spread throughout 20 events in 20 days

The 'bigun' is a NLHE $2600 buy-in $3,000,000 guar.
Satellites are runnin now

Full WCOOP schedule below
http://www.pokerstars.com/wcoop/

I'm eyeballing event #12
Pot Limit Omaha Eight or Better ($200k guar)

Da Sharkster is bankrolling my initial attempt at this goal
Stay toooned for reports...

Lotsa good Omaha and Holdem strategy in the Conned Forum

======================

This Sunday! Sweetness takes over the Vet Series hosting gig. $350 added for this small field, pro structure event. Check out the great reviews and good times players are having in this event, clik laggsters

Poker Ocean is the venue. New to PokO? Clik

Already have an account there? Then log in to this event, plop down chump change ($5.50) and soot up to play my best 50 or 60 players. Scared? Don't wanna risk $6 when you know Cardluvr or Charterboss will trap you like its your first day playin' play chips? I feel yer pain. Stick to freerolls, it's safer.

Password is sweet

Sunday 8/20, 8PM Poker Ocean.

===========================

Check out my new favorite Forum post. CliCk

It has pics of many Shark players. Lets keep this thread going. Post a pic for us.
Instructs on posting pics are at the top of the thread.

My Friend Trevor Korab and bride

Had the trip of a lifetime last Winter! Torino, Italy to watch the best Curling crew on the planet, led by their son Jamie (middle)! Trevor is highly respected playa "Treebor" on our Tour. Great pic and proud parents!




I love Vegas pics.....



Email me now for passwords to our 3 Freerolls this week, including Pot Limit Omaha 8/b and the highly acclaimed Sharks Vet Series ($6). Up this week, Bronx Bomber Titokhan hosts! Join known tight/agg Uncle Tito for an evening of fun and frollick.

shark@sharkpokertour.com

Coming up this week. Our best Shark Omaha player "ConnJure" will be guest blogging. "Quest for the PLO8 World Championship of Online Poker"

Doug Conn will be reporting on several satellite events on his way to a World Championship, fame and large amounts of cashish. Get er dun, Doug.

Epic Battle at Sun Poker!

Shark Vet Series at Sun Poker was taken down by long time Vet and avid Shark athletic supporter CEV2nd! Nice work Lee and a sweet $170 cashola score-arama. chachachachingy! Chingy was 6th!

Unknown chip tossin loon carlasw was hittin 2 outers and rammin and jammin for second and $102! Nice effort from the new girl (I think Carla?). Carlasw also launched my dumpy ass in 7th with a 2 outer on turn for a bigger set. I donked Titokhan earlier when he hit a str8 and my 9 outer came for the nut flush on riv. Sorry brudda (not).

freethinker was killin it as usual (3rd) and feared sandbagger Gilbee was 4th. Gilbert is tuff. Only 27 entries for a disappointing turnout. Lets go playas! This is a killer event. Sun apologized for the chip error (only 1500 starting chips).

This week its Uncle Tito! Titokhan hosts at Poker.com Shark Pool Party. HUGE add, NL hold'em, Britney Spears, Lindsey Lohan, (search engine help, pay no attention)64 funny cars and fire breathin, tire burnin' check raising action! Have no friends? Lets play poker Sunday night at 8PM EST. I'll be your friend. I never steal blinds and rarely bluff. I also am an honest car salesman.

Bring it, ladies.....

Poker.com register and play now laggsters

More Vet Series info here

This is our forum. Most of you registered and never post. A few vets succumb to my begging and post regular. We need your forum HeLp! If the forum grows the added money will get HuGe. Its really fun once you get over the initial fear of posting. Post a joke. Tell a story. How bout your favorite trip this summer? I love camping stories. Hell, I even read Triple B's bad beat stories (appearing daily). Get in there, help us out. Thank you.

The Shark Is in Action at WSOP

Not Shark Hathaway, not Mark "the other" Shark Seif. It's Humberto!

from Cardplayer:

Humberto Brenes Is Having a Blast
Humberto Brenes is giving Spanish lessons this week.

“How do you say shark in Spanish?” he asked ESPN’s cameras the other day. And no, Mr. Scholar, who taught my ninth-grade Spanish class, it’s not “tiburon.”
According to Brenes, everybody should know that the English-to-Spanish translation of “shark” is “Humberto.”

During the tournament, the Poker Prince of Costa Rico has protected his cards with a novelty chip protector made to look like a shark that Seth Weinger, the owner and creator of a line of markers called Poker Faces, gave to Brenes at the Gaming Expo last week.

The shark has followed Brenes from table to table. He’s started calling it his friend. He even says the shark’s making decisions for him, despite the clear rule that calls for only one player to a hand. He has said the words “chomp, chomp, chomp” over and over again this past week while building his stack, smiling and laughing all the way.

Brenes, who has been playing tournament poker for many years now and has many cashes (he cashed in seven events at this year’s WSOP alone), has a real chance to make it to the final table again even though he sits below average with about $600,000 in chips.

And that would be phenomenal for Weinger, who debuted his product at this year’s WSOP. He created his line of chip markers, which feature 14 different characters that are supposed to represent different kinds of poker personalities, to fund buy-ins to major poker tournaments, he said. “It was just a stupid idea that I thought would be a fun thing to do,” he said.

He’s thrilled to have a high-profile player like Brenes enjoy his product so much, and expects the footage filmed will help his small business in a major way.

“He’s the perfect guy to have playing with it,” Weinger said.

Brenes just spent most of Sunday playing at the featured table, so people everywhere will be able to see the shark in action. They’ll also get to see Brenes play some poker.

Poker Faces Card Protectors

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I like Humberto. Great player as well.

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Play a sit n go tonight, take it down, then post details in our forum.

Your Pal, Sharkeee

No Play For The One Toofed Shark!

Sorry for the lack of Poker play from me lately. I have plans to hit the road soon to play sum tourneys (and online MTT's also) but the "real" job and too many affiliate sites are keeping me buried. I miss chatting with buds online like BORN, Tito, and many others. My plan is to build these last 2 sites (under const. now) SharksVegasStrip.com and DeepSeaCasinos.com (partner is my friend John on the Deep Sea site)then get back to what I really wanna do......Play Poker. Move up a level or two and be playing great for the move to Vegas in a few months.

We had a HUGE month at the ole Subaru lot this month. 137 new cars, 98 used, which puts us #1 for the west coast and probably about 3rd in the nation. This was done with only 15 sales people (2 rookies) and one internet guy (hes an animal, 29 cars in one month). I did okay, 12.5 cars and the first kind words spoken to me from the Gen Mgr. "good job". whoooooooooo. I was so excited I went home and had 3 ensures with a whiskey back.

Can't wait to hang up the old plaid jacket, white belt and bell bottoms (std car salesman). Next year I will never again mutter these excellent phrases "if I could....would ya" or "i'll have to check with my manager" how bout this one "what would it take to EARN yer business today?"

These of course are all phrases a good saleperson would never spew. The next time you go to a dealership and are attacked by 3 young guys with a gallon of dippity do in their hair just turn around, drive out and find another dealer. I'll guarantee you that dealer does not have the customers best interests in mind. Put a buncha fast talkers into attack mode! Pasadena.

Check out a great new Omaha article in the Forum (me bud Doug Conn is becoming a great writer). Go to his Conned Forum, its under "Omahalic". Tommorrow he will be posting rules and strategy for a fun new game that is getting a ton of play at the World Series of Poker, WSOP, BADUGI. You can now learn to play Badugi online. I'll post links tommorrow.

See you at Sun Poker this Sunday for the PRO structure "Vet Series". AANuts took it down last week in a surprising upset heads up against famed Shark playa Sweetness. Join one of the best NL players on the planet, my buddee ReelCrazy (Steve), this Sunday and 64 funny cars, budweiser grrrrls and autographed pics of Carmen Electra's nekkid boobs. Okay, to be honest..it will just be me and Reel plus about 70 of our best Shark players. Money added, Shark gear to launch REEL, great structure. blah blah blah. 8:30 PM EST. More details in our forum. Its only 5 bucks. You can miss hangin at the Sizzler one weekend can't ya?

Strong stuff from fellow blogger doubleas
from double aces blog
Sell Your Hand

The way you play your hand will either convince your opponent to fold or will create suspicions that you’re bluffing and will get them to call you. The interesting aspect of selling your hand is that you may play your bluffing hand exactly the way you would play a great hand, but it all depends on how your opponent believes that you would play a great hand. If you play your hand differently than they think you would play a good hand, they will be more likely to call you. The best way to sell your hand is to pay close attention to how your opponent plays their monsters. If they always slow play big hands early in the hand, they will be less likely to believe that you have a great hand if you bet strong early in the hand.

Play your hand the way you think your opponent would play a great hand in your position. They will be more apt to believe you and fold to your bluff. Many times, you’ll find yourself in the late stages of a hand when you start to consider a bluff. You may miss your draw or just pick up a sense of weakness from your opponent. Before you impulsively bet a lot of chips, think about how you have played the hand up until now and think about whether your opponent will believe that you have a big hand instead of a drawing hand that missed.

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Start Savin' for "Sharks do Vegas" May 07. Here you will witness me lil wifeys favorite phrase "honey, I need another hundy". I'll be available for prepaid lap dances, sashimi gorging and a Shark pool party with cabana and heavily stocked bar at Treasure Island. Boodles and Tonic big lime for me! A double? Honeybunny..can I have a double? Hope all yer lagg asses can make it to Vegas.

I never steal,

Sharkmasta